Now that I've gotten your hopes up with that great Futurama preview, time to dash them on the rocks with this abomination:
Here's a list of character names from the movie juxtaposed with their original counterparts:
D.G. = Dorothy Gale
Glitch = Scare Crow
Cain = Tin Man
Raw = Cowardly Lion
Azkadellia = Wicked Witch of the West
Mystic Man = The Wizard
So, besides having grating references to "the O.Z." this show features character names so X-tremely radical that you simply can't believe how awesomely tubular they are.
The costumes are also terrible. Is that a lion-man, or the retarded offspring of X-Men villain Sabertooth and those Geico cavemen? Alan Cumming's character shows us what the cover of "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" would look like if it was inhabited by emo zombies. And the Tin Man has been turned into a badass cowboy for some fucking reason.
Here's a list of other modern, edgy changes - which, incidentally, I have completely made up - sure to transform L. Frank Baum's beloved children's fantasy into a carnival horror show:
1. Original songs by My Chemical Romance.
2. Flying monkeys replaced by flying monkeys with electric Razor Scooters.
3. Emerald City now called Bling-Bling Land.
4. Toto makes an appearance as ten-story-high mecha-dog, T.O.T.O.
5. "I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas, anymore," delivered with extra thick, self-aware postmodern irony.
6. Instead of asking for an oil can, the Tin Man requests that Dorothy update his drivers with a virus-blocking firewall.
7. "Lions, and Tigers, and Bears! OMG!"
8. Dorothy defeats the witch by pouring water on her...and then tossing a live power cable into the puddle, saying, "You're gonna get me and my little dog? Get this!"
One thing is for certain: the term "re-imagining" is now synonymous with "childhood-raping."
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